In a state-of-the-art music video starring Justin Welby, ‘the Outfit formerly known as the Church of England’ has mounted a spectacular relaunch.

WOKECHURCH’, said a Lambeth Palace spokesperson, ‘is a dynamic response to plummeting attendance figures, especially among young people. Out with the old tired language of ‘grace’, ‘repentance’ and ‘salvation’! Our new watchwords will be ‘equality’, ‘inclusion’ and ‘personal autonomy’.

‘And there’s to be a radical change from the head down. In place of HM the Queen as Supreme Governor we have adopted the Duchess of Sussex. A remarried divorcee of mixed race whose first husband was Jewish and who was educated at a Catholic school is so much more where we (and you!) are at.’

WOKECHURCH will care with you, share with you, and accept you as you are.
WOKECHURCH is concerned for the planet.
WOKECHURCH is vegan in spirit, opposed to Brexit and responsible in its use of plastics.
WOKECHURCH is a club without rules.

WOKECHURCH exists primarily for the benefit of those who have decided not to be its members.

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